Unsuitable for children

What happens to you if you are an unsuccessful manager/coach at four clubs? You become a pundit on Match of the Day 2.

Viewers last night were treated to the sight of Iain Dowie deploying his expertise. Seriously folically challenged and pop eyed, Dowie fortunately appeared after the watershed but no warning was given to viewers of a nervous disposition.

Asked by Adrian Chiles to draw on his experience and say what one did if one had one's back against the wall, Dowie attempted jocularity and replied 'Panic'. Or send the team on a crazy training run?